Sep 3

Sep 3 Under his eye

Never, in my nastiest nightmares, did I ever think I would have to make the decision to let my child die - let alone twice. But I have: Adelaide was a beautiful little girl that passed away outside of my body days before her fourth birthday and Elvis was my little gummy bear that I carried inside me for 20 weeks. Both decisions were wretched to make but I do not second guess either of them. Please read more about our brief time with Elvis in my blog from 2019 called All My Children.

Shortly after Elvis died I felt compelled to advocate for women receiving abortions further into their pregnancy because I truly believe they are misunderstood. Terminating for medical reasons carries similar grief and trauma to a miscarriage or still birth but you also have to live with the fear of undeserved judgement. As of this week, however, I guess we have to advocate for abortion as a human right in itself.

To catch everyone up, as of September 1st it is illegal to get an abortion after 6 weeks gestation in Texas. There is no exception for rape or incest. Any US citizen can sue any Texas resident if they believe that person assisted with an abortion. This could be a provider, a relative who helped pay for it, or the Lyft driver who took them to the clinic. If the case comes down in the prosecutions favor they will be awarded $10,000. In case you’re wondering where the Supreme Court stands on this, they could have blocked the bill but did not.

Ok, so let me break this down for you and what this actually means for the women of Texas and potentially in other states as legislators scramble to put together similar bills. Many women do not discover they are pregnant until after six weeks. Let’s say a 14 year old girl, who is molested by her father/uncle/family friend, is able to get her hands on a pregnancy test after she misses her period. She has a week, maybe two to have the courage to tell someone what has been done to her AND make a decision about becoming a mother… at 14. Oh, and should she decide to get an abortion after six weeks, her rapist can sue her for doing so.

Now, for the one in four women who have suffered a miscarriage, are you ready to defend your miscarriage in a court of law? What if your neighbor suspects that you had an abortion instead of a miscarriage and takes your husband to court for ‘assisting’. Think this is a stretch? One Texas anti-abortion group has already set up a whistleblower website where people can leave anonymous tips.

I want to be very clear that this bill will exceedingly affect those living below the poverty line and people of color. This bill doesn’t stop abortions from happening it just means that the wealthy will travel out of state - on “vacations” - where they can have legal abortion access. It is those that cannot afford to travel, to take the time off of work, to leave their already full home of children, who will be forced to carry to term or choose to risk a now illegal abortion. These are the same people that already do not have access to affordable health care or contraception. Further, if the wealthy do get sued they have the financial and legal means to fight the action - those less fortunate will not have access to the same quality of legal services. It doesn’t take a social justice major to see how this law can be easily manipulated to discriminate against others.

I also want to point out that this bill is NOT what the majority of Americans, or even Texans support. A 2019 NPR/PBS/Marist poll showed that of the American surveyed “77% say the Supreme Court should uphold Roe… Just 13% overall say it should be overturned.”

What is the goal here? To save a life? If so, whose? If politicians really wanted to lower the rate of abortions they would make sure that informed sex education (not abstinence) was being taught in schools, that all communities have access to free reproductive health clinics or that birth control could be purchased over-the-counter. But they don’t.

Because that’s not the goal.

No, it is for the wealthy, predominately white cis-men to retain power. If women do not have control of their own reproductive systems then it is harder for them to move up in society. But it goes well beyond that. Without access to total reproductive healthcare, including abortions, it is increasingly difficult for those living below the poverty line to escape poverty, keeping them working multiple jobs, feeling powerless, voiceless and away from the ballot box.

Please, even if you think abortion is immoral, stop and follow our current trajectory. Where does it end? You are free to have your own personal convictions. If you don’t think you could get an abortion then you don’t have to! But let me just say, as someone who has, you have no idea what you would do until you are in that position. This is a MEDICAL decision made by a woman or a family. Knowing first hand what went into making our very personal decision, I don’t know how anyone could ever presume to make that decision for anyone else under any circumstance.

Least of all cis-men who will never be pregnant.